


Promise Me You'll Never Say Goodbye

by hikari_yuma



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: 30 Day Haikyuu!! Writing Challenge, Day 7, I'm so sorry, Other, but then again not really, poor oikawa, rip suga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 08:37:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3643764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hikari_yuma/pseuds/hikari_yuma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All is well with Oikawa Tooru. They have a pretty great life and gets to talk their crush everyday. Then one day, they notice that Sugawara isn't looking too well. That day, their life changes forever. </p><p>--- </p><p>Since they’d grown close, Tooru had learnt that Suga really was very fragile. Over the past few months, that seemed even more so. He was like glass, and however tightly Oikawa wanted to cling to him, they were scared to hang on too tightly or push too hard in case Koushi shattered.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promise Me You'll Never Say Goodbye

Skipping down a dimly-lit street, a long-legged university student grinned bright enough to give light to the shadows following them.

“Da dum, da dum, da da dum ,” They hummed, swinging their bag over their shoulder so that it stopped bashing into their knees. “Da da da, hey! Da da, hey! Da –“ That was when the familiar chorus of ‘Uptown Funk’ blared out of their pocket, stopping them mid-skip. Nearly overbalancing, the brunette hurried to fish their phone out of their  pocket. At first it seemed as if they were going to hang up immediately, but they did a double take when they spotted the caller ID. If it were possible, their smile doubled tenfold and they hurried to put their phone to their ear. “Hey, Kou-chan~!” Their voice rang out in the otherwise quiet street. Soon they resumed skipping, slightly breathless from the exertion of it. The conversation they continued with said ‘Kou-chan’ continued until they arrived home.

Even then, as soon as the brunette flopped down onto their bed they grabbed their phone and began emailing the other.  It wasn’t until late at night until their conversation ceased and when Oikawa Tooru finally allowed sleep to claim them, their adoring smile stayed upon their face.

~~~

“Kou-chan!” The brunette yelled – much louder then he’d expected. Flushing, any pretence of being calm and cool blown, they bounded over to a silver-haired university student with a mole under his left eye and a sweet smile upon his face.

“Hiya, Tooru.” As Oikawa examined their friend and crush, their eyes narrowed slightly. The smile being offered to him, while genuine, was weary, and the shorter of the pair had dark smudges under his eyes. With his face completely drained of colour, the undergraduate before them looked as if he was going to fall over where he stood.

“Look at you, all dressed up.” The brunette attempted to hide his worry with another grin, despite it lacking the lustre it had just held. “The great Sugawara Koushi, in all of his glory.” They gestured to the smart suit that Suga wore. “Your first big shot at a job right?”

“Yeah.” Running his hands through his hair, Koushi managed to smile in a way that made his rich brown eyes flash with their usual flare. “I’ve worked so hard to get here…I hope it all works out.” Relieved to see their friend’s eyes filled with their old fire, Tooru began to relax, throwing an arm around Suga’s shoulders and turning him towards the massive building in front of them.

“You’ll do great, Kou-chan.” Oikawa whispered, squeezing the other’s shoulder. “You always do. I’m…I’m really proud of you.” Their voice hitched slightly, the confidence leaving it.

“Hey, Tooru…you know, I’ve been meaning to –“

“Suga!”

“Ah, Daichi! I’m coming.” The voice that had interrupted Koushi’s quiet words belonged to a tall sophomore with dark hair and concern flashing across his face.

“C’mon, we’re going to be late!” Daichi urged, giving a distracted wave to Tooru.

“I’ll be right there!” Suga called back, wriggling away from Oikawa. He turned to face his friend. “I’ll…I’ll tell you later, okay?” Strangely, Koushi’s voice, which had seemed light only moments ago, was strained. “Just…it’s not good at all, and I want you to know in case –“

“ _Sugawara!_ ” Once more, Daichi’s voice cut through Suga’s sharply.

“I – look, Tooru, just promise me you’ll wait for me tonight.” And with that, Suga turned and hurried up the stairs after Daichi. Oikawa watched him go, eyes narrowed in thought.

As they began the trip home – they’d only gone into town for Koushi , after all – their thoughts drifted back to his silver-haired friend with concern. It wasn’t their imagination that Suga had begun to look sick all the time over the past few months. They knew they weren’t imaging how thin Suga was when they hugged him, how frail and delicate he had become. Oikawa had known Suga since high school – granted, not well, seeing as they’d only really seen each other on the volleyball courts, but even then Suga had been strong. Since they’d grown close, Tooru had learnt that Suga really was very fragile. Over the past few months, that seemed even more so. He was like glass, and however tightly Oikawa wanted to cling to him, they were scared to hang on too tightly or push too hard in case Koushi shattered.

And his smile seemed so forced…Oikawa clenched their hands into fists. They were an idiot.

Koushi had been hurting all this time and they hadn’t done anything.

“Tonight I’ll try and fix him.” Tooru whispered. “I need to help them, or…” They imagined Suga’s beautiful smile fading and shivered. No. They wouldn’t let that smile die.

And that was a promise.

~~~

They stared at their feet, growing restless. It was getting quite late, and Koushi still hadn’t shown. It wasn’t like his friend to not be late, and especially after how bad he’d looked that day…Oikawa sighed and dug their into their pockets, now glaring venomously at the ground. They could only hope Suga hadn’t backed out, or anything…

That was when their phone began to rang.

With a start, Tooru grabbed their phone and glanced at the caller ID, as they usually did. It was Suga. Heaving a sigh of relief, they answered it without further delay and prepared for Suga panicking about being late. Oikawa smiled gently. He’d be so flustered…so worried that he’d upset Tooru…

“Oikawa-san?” Tooru froze when they heard it wasn’t Koushi’s voice on the other end of the line.

It was…Daichi?!

“Sawa…mura?” They choked out. Suga never left his phone behind. Why did Daichi have it? Why was he calling Oikawa? Something serious had happened, without a doubt.

“Yeah, it’s me.” Daichi inhaled as if it was painful. “Listen…Suga…he collapsed.”

Tooru’s blood ran cold.

_‘Collapsed?’_

“He’s in the hospital and was asking for you.” Daichi continued uneasily. But there was something about his voice…he was holding back.

“But?” Oikawa snapped, before angrily chastising himself. “Shit, I’m sorry –“

“Don’t be. I know how you feel. Anyway, he…Suga’s in the ICU.  They…the doctors don’t know if he’s gonna make it but…”

“Do they know what happened?” Tooru choked out, legs going weak. They slid down the brick well they’d been leaning against, unable to digest the information.

_‘Suga…in the ICU…’_

“They think it might’ve a been a heart attack or a stroke or something, but it’s serious.” Daichi sounded exhausted. “I’m really sorry, Oikawa. I don’t know anymore. Just…I don’t know if he’ll make it and I thought you might want to come up to the hospital, just in case something…” The Sawamura trailed off, voice thick with emotion.

“S-sure.” Tooru’s stomach twisted and their chest had tightened so that it was hard to breathe. “I’ll be there.”

_‘I promise.’_

~~~

They only saw Sugawara once more before he died.

“Look, he’s not going to make it.” One of the doctor’s had come out of the room where Suga had been treated. They’d moved him out of the ICU and he was on life support, the last thread holding him to life. “If you want to –“

“You can’t fix him?” Oikawa spoke up, harshly interrupting the doctor.

“Well, no, but –“

“You should have.”

“It’s out of our control now –“

“I don’t care!” Tooru had roared, surging to their feet. “It’s your job! You’re just going to let someone like him _die_ without giving a single fuck –“

“Oikawa-san –“ Now Daichi had stood, lunging for the furious.

“I can understand how this must be hard for you.” The doctor was trying to calm them down.

“No! What about Suga? What about what he wants? What he _deserves?!_ ” In their mind’s eye they saw Koushi, turned towards them wearing a smile full of optimism and confidence.

_‘I’ve worked so hard to get here!’_

_‘Hey, Tooru, d’you reckon I’ll get it?’_

_‘I’ve waited so long for this!’_

_‘I’m so excited, Tooru. Hey, I’ll bring you with me a few times. We’ll go out somewhere. Just the two of us.’_

Oikawa felt tears gathering behind their eyes, burning and sharp and full of fear.

_‘What if Suga leaves?’_

As this thought crossed their mind they went limp and Daichi had to stop them from crumpling to the ground.

“He can’t go.” Tooru whispered in anguish. “He can’t. I love him.” They didn’t care anymore.

If Suga left, they’d have no one.

The doctor was watching them both sympathetically.

“Sugawara’s parents are overseas currently. Seeing as he has no next of kin we can admit to see him, how about I let you both in?” The doctor asked softly. Oikawa only nodded, while Daichi did all the niceties. Oikawa couldn’t care less about being polite, not while Suga…not while he…

_‘Don’t think about it.’_

Some plan that was, when they were going in to see Sugawara in the final moments of his life.

~~~

Oikawa still couldn’t stand it, how pale and sickly Koushi looked. For the first minute or so all they’d been able to do was stand in the doorway, looking across at their friend lying limp and helpless in the hospital bed. Now they were sitting on a stool next to Koushi’s bed, both of Suga’s frail hands clutched in their own, hunched over and whispering “I’m sorry” over and over, until the words blurred together in a meaningless blend of torment and grief.

“Hey…Tooru…I was…going to…tell you about how…this has been happening…” Suga croaked, voice strangled. “Daichi…knew…but not you. I thought…if I just…stuck to the medication…it’d all work out…but…” Clearly it was a struggle to pronounce each syllable, Suga’s tongue clumsy and slow and making his speech almost incomprehensible. Oikawa glanced at Daichi, leaning against the wall with his head bowed. There was the tiniest pressure on their hands and Tooru’s attention was once more stolen by the silver-haired beauty that had captivated them since day 1. “I also…wanted to say…” Oikawa had to lean forwards to hear him.

“Yeah?” They wanted to squeeze Suga’s hands, but the fear that even this would cause Koushi to shatter had returned.

“I…love you.”

No, no, _no._  This, _this_ was real torture. Suga, their dear, precious Sugawara; courageous, optimistic Koushi; a sweet, loving angel that had brought Oikawa back into the light, lifting him onto their feet – loved them.

_Loved him._

And yet now, just as soon as the sheer elation that came with the confession came, it was maimed and destroyed by the agony of at any moment, Suga disappearing for good, and being out of their reach forever.

“I…have to leave you, Tooru…I’m…so…sorry.”

“Suga.” It was Daichi again. With one look at Daichi’s face, and the knock on the door signalling the arrival of the doctors, Oikawa knew they barely had any time. So they gently cupped Suga’s face and pressed their lips together. It was bittersweet and painful, but Tooru felt it had to be done.

“Don’t be sorry.” Oikawa was saying, just as the door was thrown open and the machine next to the bed began to emit high-pitched noises that stung at their ears. “Just…please don’t say goodbye.” They felt a hand on their arm.

“A minute.” The doctor from before was saying. Oikawa looked up at Daichi, who looked about as broken as they felt.

“Sugawara Koushi, I love you too.” Tooru spoke their confession as soon as they were able to. “I love you, and I just –“

“40 seconds approximately.”

“- promise me –“

“30 seconds and counting.”

“- that you’ll never say goodbye to me.”

“I…I promise, Tooru.”

~~~

In the space of a single day, Oikawa Tooru’s life had been changed forever.

But they knew, that for as long as they lived, they would not, and could not, forget the angel named Sugawara Koushi, that had shown him how to live again.

**Author's Note:**

> Well. That was emotionally compromising owo  
> After reading over it I realise that there's a bit of backstory that needs to be added. Maybe I'll add it one day xD  
> Thank you for reading this angsty Oisuga fic and I'm not as sorry as I should be if this made you cry o-o  
> I hope you enjoyed this?? If you could??  
> You can find me on tumblr with the url oikawa6 :D


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